THE NAVY WIVE'S ALPHABET

by Mrs. Jean Ebbert

A is for Adaptable, which is supposed to be my middle name. Also for Absent, which my hus-band is A lot, especially when the Anchor's Aweigh.

B is for Basic, as in Basic Allowance for Quarters and Basic Allowance for Subsistence. (See "L".)

C is for Cost of living which is always going up and for Commissary which I therefore I need more than ever

D is for Dependent, which is what the Navy says I am, even though everybody knows you can't survive Navy life unless you're extremely independent.

E is for Empty, which is what my wallet is at the End of Each pay period.

F if for Fabulous Foreign ports I hope he'll bring me back Fabulous bargains From.

G is for Government and Goldbraid and "Good Grief Charlie Brown, who in Washington thought that one up!"

H is for housing "on the economy," which so of-ten seems (a) too small, (b) too expensive, (c) too close to the Base, (d) too far from Base, (c) all of the above.

I is for ID card on which my picture looks Idiotic,

J is for Jack of all trades, which it would be Just dandy if I were one.

Kis for Kilometers and Knots, both of which Kinda Konfuse me.

L is for Lavish, which is what I wish allowances were, instead of Basic. (see "B".)

M is for Mail from the ship, which is sometimes a Maybe thing.

N is for mmmm - er - uh - (gosh, can't think of anything for this one.)

O is for Orders to Outer Transvania and Other places I never heard Of

P is for Personal Property lost and damaged in our last Permanent Change of Station, for which I will Positively be reimbursed (Perhaps).

Q is for Qualified, which I am getting to be at practically everything.

R is for his Return from deployment, which is Really Romantic.

S is for Starboard, which Sailors on Ships Say when they mean "right."

T is for Trips To The Tailor, when his uniform mysteriously Tightens across his Tummy.

U is for Unexpected changes in the ship's schedule, which I Understand are Unavoidable but which I'm often Unprepared for and so they Usually make me Upset, or even Uptight.

V is for Volunteer work, which I know is a Very fine thing, but sometimes I get too Vound up in it.

W is for Navy Wives, Who are Wonderful, Witty, Wise, Warm and Winsome. Whoever Would argue With this is no longer Welcome aboard.

X is for Navy X-change, which I am very glad

Y is for Yards and Yeoman and Yo-bo-bo-, all of which sound very nautical, don't You think?

Z is for ''zulu," which is what the Navy calls the last letter of the alphabet, which I think is a Zany thing to do

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